Showing posts with label choice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label choice. Show all posts

Thursday, 13 November 2014

NaNo2014: Shadows of Friendship: Part 13



Twilight rocked back slightly as she considered what she had read. She knew about as much about the puzzle upon her bed as she did about the Elements of Harmony, which was very little. Both her tutor and her dam-sire apparently knew more and neither of them had shared the information with her for her own safety. Twilight was actually a little offended that the Princess had not trusted her enough to give her the choice sooner. She understood that Celestia was worried about losing her like she had lost her sister and her last student, but it was her life so surely it was her choice.

She did not understand about the ‘Guardian of the Shadows’ bit though. She did not know what the ‘Shadows’ were or how she was supposed to guard them. If an alicorn Princess had given her life to seal them away, then they were surely a bad thing and they should be guarded against, not protected. Unless the idea was to protect them against others who would use them to hurt others like Nightmare Moon had wanted to do a thousand years ago, or Sunset Shimmer, who Twilight had had heard had gone a little crazy and hurt a bunch of ponies before she had fled the castle.

If she completed the puzzle, that would be her role. Her duty would be to shield other ponies from the dark magic. She could imagine that it would be a role that would allow her plenty of practise with her magic and could possibly lead into studies in more exotic magicks. It could be interesting. However she did not doubt that it would be dangerous too. The Princess had been writing like she had not expected to succeed in her attempt to defeat Nightmare Moon and save her sister and that worried Twilight. Celestia was much more powerful than she was and she had quite clearly failed the test on friendship that would have allowed her to use the Elements of Harmony, so how was she, as the Guardian of the Shadows, meant to succeed where her tutor had failed?

Of course she had to make that choice first. Did she want that responsibility? Celestia had given her the choice to turn it down and stay safe if she wanted. Twilight had this odd feeling though that trying to stay out of it would not protect her when Nightmare Moon came calling.

Besides the puzzle was a test. A test she had been trying to complete for eight years. If she failed to complete it, she would not only be turning her back on her mentor, but she would willingly fail the test her dam-sire had set her so long ago. Not only that but the wish that was the prize at the end of all her hard work, would never come true.

She was certain that now she knew the risks of being tempted by the darkness, she could keep it at bay and even If she struggled, she had her brother and her mentor who could help her. If they kept an eye on her then they would be able to see the warning signs and stop her from falling. She would not be Sunset Shimmer, who had betrayed the Princess and frightened so many before her departure from the castle. She would not let herself be that pony. If she took on the role as Guardian of the Shadows, she would do her duty properly. No matter how much work it was. If that was the role Celestia trusted her to take, then she wanted to live up to that trust.

She picked up the piece the Princess had returned to her, examining it carefully as she thought over her options. She wanted to believe she had the strength to carry the burden. The Princess seemed to think that she might but Twilight was just as uncertain as her mentor. Plus she did not know what she wanted her wish to be. It was selfish, but she did not just want to wish Nightmare Moon away. Not only would it make her teacher unhappy if her sister vanished for good, but it felt like cheating and she wanted her wish to be something she wanted. It was selfish, she knew, but after eight years of hard work, if her ‘prize’ was to be placed into a dangerous role, she felt she deserved that one, single wish.

“I…” Twilight hesitated, her mind going over the events of the previous day. She had enjoyed thinking that she had made a few friends and spending time doing something new. If she could have one wish, just one wish, it was that she would like some friends that would not tease her or use her to further their own studies or place in Celestia’s court. Someone she could trust to save her rump if things got bad once she had accepted her role and who she could help in return… “I wish…I wish I had friends I could rely on,” She spoke out loud as she slowly inserted the piece, “And who could rely on me in turn. Friends who I can trust and share everything with…”

The final piece clicked into place and Twilight let out a startled mix of a gasp and shriek as magic erupted from it, temporarily overwhelming her senses. When she came to, she was on the floor, the completed puzzle on the ground before her and any signs of the magic that had emerged when she had completed completely erased, almost like it had never happened at all, except for the fact she had been on the bed when she had finished the puzzle.

“What in the hay?” Twilight breathed, cautiously levitating the completed artefact alongside her while she returned to her place on the bed, trying to piece together what had happened and coming up blank.

It did not matter really. Nothing had gone wrong, nothing had been harmed and she was perfectly fine. A few missed seconds were not really a big issue and it was possible that the missed seconds her just been her magic and that she supposedly gained as the ‘Guardian of the Shadows’ intertwining and disrupting her magic’s natural flow. There was even a reasonable explanation for the pulse of magic. She had to be able to recognise the magic she was supposed to be using if she was going to be able to control it. At least that’s what she tried to convince herself as she examined the completed trinket.

It looked like an upside down pyramid, like the ones she had seen in the pictures of Saddle Arabia, except for the hoop at the top. She was pretty sure she could thread something through it so she could wear it rather than risk it falling apart in her bag if she accidently shoved books on top of it, which was a worryingly likely scenario. Not that she was sure it would come apart easily anyway. Now it was finished it was surprisingly sturdy and she could feel a weak aura of the same magic from earlier surrounding it and interweaving with the pieces, almost as if it was helping hold it together. It was kind of a relief. She did not want to have to reassemble it at the slightest knock after all.

She looked up when the door creaked open. Spike poked his head in, looking concerned despite the lampshade on his head. “Are you alright, Twilight?” He asked, worried for her. “You’re missing one heck of a…you finished it?!” His train of thoughts derailed as he spotted the finished puzzle. “You’ve been working on it forever!”

“Not quite that long.” Twilight chuckled, though she was not surprised Spike thought so considering that she had received it before she had hatched Spike’s egg. “Can you get me a rope or something to thread it onto?”

“Sure!” The dragonet scurried away and came back with a streamer made of silver ribbon. Twilight smiled at him gratefully as she used her magic to thread the ribbon through the hoop, wrapping it around the loop a couple of times to make sure that it was secure and the fabric would not rip. “Are you coming down to the party now?”

“I…” Twilight did not want to, but her wish could not come true if she avoided everyone. Instead she tied the streamer in a loop and put it on, feeling a little odd as the weight settled on her neck and wondering if she would ever get used to how heavy it felt.

“Please Twilight? It’s almost time for the sun to come up anyway.” Spike tried reasoning with her, much to the unicorn’s amusement. “You wouldn’t have to talk to other ponies for long…”

It was not that she did not like talking to other ponies. She just always struggled to find some common ground with them. That was why getting along with Pinkie Pie had been such a pleasant surprise. She had nothing in common with the pink, crazy earth pony. She was loud, she was bouncy and she had no concept of personal space. Yet she and Pinkie had spent hours in each other’s company and chatted away and had generally had fun.

Which was why she did not want to go down. Thinking about it logically, it was quite possible that the hot sauce had not been meant for her. It had just been the closest bottle to her when she had gone to take a drink. The amused smirks and laughter would have been the same towards any pony who had reacted as she had. Even she would have found the situation amusing if it had not been her in that position. She was just over reacting because she was too used to being bullied in school without being able to fight back. As Celestia’s personal student she was ‘supposed to rise above it’ and not ‘react in an undignified manner.’

Running upstairs and hiding like a foal probably counted as the latter, even if it had allowed her to finish her puzzle. Fleeing like that had probably made a worse impression on the citizens of Ponyville then the prank had in the first place.

“Alright Spike.” Twilight could not help but sigh as her baby dragon grinned like a loon. “I’ll be down in a minute, I promise.”

“You’ll enjoy it.” Spike promised. “Rainbow Dash got a duelling ring going and…”

Spike knew just what to say to make her evening. She had completed the puzzle and that was awesome, even if it had come with a job to do, but if she wanted to get to know the ponies here and still stand a chance of passing her mentor’s test, there were not many better ways to understand a pony then learning how they thought from across a duelling field.

“Two minutes.” Twilight swore. Spike did not entirely look like he believed her but he nodded, causing the lampshade on his head to nearly tumble off, and headed back downstairs. The unicorn watched him go with a shake of her head and a chuckle before tidying around and checking her deck was up together.

Once she was certain she was about as ready as she was ever going to be, she took a deep breath and stepped out of her bedroom. The party was in full swing below and she could quite easily see the small group of ponies to one side of the room, over by the snack tables, who had their decks laid out on the floor and were playing each other.

Pretty much all the ponies that she had spent time with the day before were there.

Monday, 2 September 2013

A Dream or a Nightmare? : Part 2



“Okay.” I told the electric mouse, deciding to focus on the problem at hand and become a gibbering wreck somewhere where I wouldn’t be seen by anyone who knew Ash, “I don’t know you and you’ve already decided that you don’t like me.” Pikachu tilted his head curiously, “But we’re stuck with each other now.” Pikachu just sat down and started pretending to ignore me, “I know you’re listening. You don’t like pokéballs, do you?”

Pikachu’s ears twitched and I could see I had his attention.

“I’ll do you a deal.” I offered. “You don’t shock me and follow on your own, and I won’t put you back in your ball or come up with some ridiculous way of making you follow. I’m sure I have some washing line in my bag somewhere. De...Mum seemed to pack everything in there, including the kitchen sink.”

Pikachu scratched behind his ear, considered her for a moment and then let off another jolt of Thundershock.

Again, for the record, ow.

“Okay, I take that as a no.” I sighed, pulling stuff out of what appeared to be a tardis bag considering everything Delia had stuffed into it. “Let’s see, ah ha! Rubber washing up gloves for me and washing line for you.” Pikachu looked irritated as I held up the rope. “Last chance. Either way you’re coming with me. Now would you prefer to meet the crowd with dignity or being dragged behind me? Because quite frankly I don’t care what people think about me, but I’m sure your pride wouldn’t recover...”

Pikachu looked from me, to the rope, back to me, realised I was serious and jumped up onto my shoulder.

“See?” I asked it, smiling slightly as I put the stuff back in the bag of holding, “Not so hard was it?”

Pikachu’s response was to let off a small jolt of electricity. Not enough to count as an attack, but enough to let me know he wasn’t happy. To be honest, at that point I was passed caring. All I wanted to do was find a quiet, out of the way place and scream and cuss every God in existence before crying for a while and I couldn’t do that while Pikachu was being a stubborn git.

Clipping the pokéball onto my belt provided a ‘leash’ of kinds. I knew from the show that captured Pokémon couldn’t go too far from their pokéball. It had been proven that even a nine hundred year old Ninetales had not been able to resist the ‘invisible wall’ it provided past a certain point.  It felt a little mean, but I was in a fine mood by that point and seeing the severely depleted crowds outside only soured my temper further.

Delia cooed over Pikachu, earning me another Thundershock and I heard someone complaining that the Ketchum boy didn’t even know how to use a pokéball properly. I think I amused Pikachu when I made a rude gesture at the speaker when Delia wasn’t looking and before they could respond with more than a “Why I oughta...” I decided now was a good time to skip town and left.

We got as far as the nearest wide open, completely empty field before I found a tree, let Pikachu down so he could wander around as he liked, dropped my backpack and then finally allowed myself to let loose.

Pikachu jumped a mile at the wail that escaped me as what was going on really hit me.

It wasn’t fair! It was insane! It was IMPOSSIBLE!

There was no way this was real and yet it was impossible to deny it. You couldn’t get hurt in dreams and Pikachu had hurt me, so I wasn’t dreaming.

I’d been other people before but that was different! That was an act! A costume donned and a persona applied for the duration of a day or a weekend in order to play games and have fun! This, this was a full gender swap, a dimensional transition and the loss of fifteen years.

Oh god puberty. I was going to have to go through puberty again! It sucked enough the first time, as a girl, how the hell was I going to cope as a guy?

I didn’t want to be here. I wanted to be at home, preparing for the convention that by now would have started. I didn’t want to be in another dimension away from everyone I cared about, no matter how cool having real Pokémon was.

I slumped down against the tree, which Pikachu had climbed when I’d startled him, and burst into tears as something else hit me.

I’d never see my family again. Never ever ever. I wanted them so bad it tore at my heart as I realised I’d never go running with dad, or shopping with mum, or discuss video games until obscene times of the morning with my brother again. They weren’t here. They couldn’t get here.

And my friends. They were all at the convention. I had been looking forward to meeting up with everyone and enjoying a weekend of sheer insanity. Now that would never happen. I could never meet up with everyone, I couldn’t call them over skype, I didn’t even have my phone as that was with my cosplay and god only knew what had happened to that.

I was alone. All alone. I’ve never been good at being alone. I’ve always been social. I’ve always needed others around, be them friends, family or colleagues.

But if I tried to talk to anyone properly here, if I tried to tell them anything, they’d think I was mad. That I’d snapped. I’d be locked away. At least with the journey ahead of me I had freedom. Even if it could never be the freedom I wanted because the people I’d want to share it with could never be there alongside me.

“Pikapi?”

Pikachu had climbed down when I’d been sobbing and now was watching me like he kind of understood what I was going through. I knew Pokémon were sentient, I’d seen enough evidence in the show to support that. But how could he know? How could he understand...had I been talking out loud?

Of course he’d understand. He wasn’t like the three normal starters, who had been raised from an egg to belong to new Trainers. He had been captured from the wild. Torn away from his family and friends and now forced into a life not of his choosing...

Without thinking I scooped him up and hugged him tightly, tears falling into soft yellow and brown fur. I felt him stiffen up and subconsciously braced for the jolt I knew was coming, only for him to relax and attempt to return the hug.

I don’t know how long we were like that, the pair of us grieving over our losses, but when I let go and he settled on my shoulder and nuzzled me, I knew that somehow, in some way, we’d bonded. Not in the way I’d expected, by getting in over our heads and somehow escaping like in the show, but through the shared pain of losing our old lives and having to start anew.

A wild Rattatta attempting to get into my pack finally broke the peace and quiet that had settled between us. Pikachu didn’t like that very much, pulling the other mouse Pokémon away from the bag and threatening it with a spark of electricity.

The Rattatta snapped at Pikachu, attempting to take a bite out of his tail and before I was even thinking properly, “Thundershock!” escaped my mouth as I grabbed for an empty pokéball that I somehow knew was on my belt. I had no intention of actually training the damn thing long term, but I wanted to...

The train of thought trailed off as I realised that I was contemplating doing to the Rattatta exactly what had been done to Pikachu and I. I dropped the pokéball as Pikachu’s attack struck the purple critter and it let out a horrible sound before escaping swiftly back into the long grass.

I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t just catch any old wild Pokémon and drag them away from their homes and friends.

“Pikapi?” Pikachu asked, concerned as he turned to face me.

“I’m okay.” I reassured my only friend in this world, picking up the empty ball. It was going to take some work, but somehow I was going to have to build a team without stealing any Pokémon away who didn’t want to come.

Suddenly I understood why Ash had such a small supply of Pokémon to his name.

This was not going to be easy.